Dollar Store Bargains

I'm putting optional closed eyelids on her face. It will help give me more privacy when I need it.
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© 2010. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Title

You know what I hate about writing? Not enough people know how to read. If there's the tiniest inaccuracy, which is likely for the translation of thoughts into words, these people who can't fill in the blanks (probably suck at crosswords, too) will get it wrong; get it completely fucking wrong. It makes you not even want to open your mouth in front of them, even to wish them Good Morning.
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Be Cool

It's a holiday today: BC Day: A day that means something different to each individual British Columbian. Some of us celebrate our escaping our provinces of origin on this day - possibly more than half of us. Some of us reflect on proud moments in BC history, like the invention of street signs to warn of bear crossings, or like when Relic ran out of gas for his outboard motor on The Beachcombers. And yet, still, others might contemplate the first four letters of the alphabet in strange new patriotic ways. Ironically enough, they may wish to listen to the foreign pop group, ABBA. It depends on who you are and what you call this land. If you call it BC, this holiday has a lot more meaning for you. I call this place DS. I have to wait until DS Day before I can fully enjoy my celebrations. But this one's still not bad.
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Hard Currency

I used to work as a cashier, and I didn't give a shit how people paid me. I figured I wasn't there to pass judgement on the customers, but that I was there to actually serve them. Pennies are a pain, but I have too much sympathy for others to rub their noses in their poverty when they are just trying to buy something to pay my wages. Another thing about pennies is they are hard currency - not like when you use a credit card to buy a can of pop. But I guess I'm a weirdo for taking this position.
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A Capitalist Offence

You Canadian workers are something else. How am I supposed to get rich in your country if I abide by your ridiculously high work standards? Now I know I said I would pay you ten dollars an hour, but that was before you finished the job for me. So take this twenty dollar bill from my bursting wallet - with no room for pennies in the change purse - and get out of my sight! I didn't even make you do the begging gesture before I handed it to you.
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Fairy Enough

BOSS: You, sir, have a bad attitude. You need money. You are not in a position to refuse demands from your prospective employers. The Pixy costume goes with the job here. OTHER WORKERS: Yeah, asshole! The Pixy costume goes with the job! BOSS: What's the matter? You ain't man enough to put on a Pixy costume like all of us? WHAT'S SO FUCKING FUNNY?
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© 2010. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Participaction

Well, son, I think you're old enough to start helping your old man with his building renovations. Here, see this nail? Just keep your fingers under its head and hold it right there... THUMP! Oops! Missed! Let's try that again.
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© 2010. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.